Imagine living a life where you always feel like an outsider, not quite fitting in, even among those closest to you. Then, one day, you crack the mystery of your identity; you were switched at birth! Sounds funny and shocking at the same time.
Well, Frederick J. George experienced these emotions firsthand at 56 years old, as he was the one who was switched at birth. After spending a lifetime, he discovered that he was never biologically related to the Lebanese family who had raised him. Instead, his true heritage was Scottish Presbyterian.
George’s unlikely life story in his memoir, Switched At Birth: My Life in Someone Else’s World, all boils down to one burning question:
Is culture shaped by genetics or by the people who raise us?
The Influence of Culture
Culture is often seen as an inherited identity, passed down through generations like heirlooms. But what happens when your biological heritage and cultural upbringing are at odds?
For George, growing up in a lively, emotionally expressive Lebanese family vastly differed from what he later learned about his biological relatives, who were more reserved and rooted in Scottish traditions.
Raised in the George family, he embraced Lebanese customs, close-knit family values, traditional foods like kibbeh and tabbouleh, and the warm, fun way they engaged with the world. His father expected him to follow Lebanese customs, even wanting George to marry within the community.
But deep inside, George always felt different. He was more introverted than his siblings, more analytical in his approach to life, and often struggled to relate to the high-energy atmosphere around him.
The Shock of Discovery
When DNA testing revealed his true origins, it forced George to reconcile his upbringing with his newfound biological identity. The Churchman family, his birth relatives, were of Scottish descent: structured, traditional, and more reserved in their expressions of affection.
This cultural contrast was not just about food, language, or religion; it was about how emotions were handled, how relationships were formed, and how identity was perceived.
Interestingly, his mother, Helen Churchman, had always suspected the switch at birth but was dismissed by the hospital staff. Meanwhile, his adoptive mother, Ngaire George, had similar doubts but brushed them off as genetic throwbacks. Life continued, with George unknowingly growing up in a family that, while loving, was never truly his own in terms of ancestry.
Nature vs. Nurture: Where Does Identity Lie?
The revelation that he was not a George but a Churchman did not erase the decades of experiences that raised him. He was still the person raised by the Georges, with the memories, traditions, and values instilled in him. Yet, discovering his true lineage opened doors to understanding why he had always felt different.
Genetics may influence personality, but culture guides how we think, act, and believe. George’s story shows how nurture can be stronger than nature.
The essence of his Lebanese upbringing sometimes clashed with his natural personality, but they also built his resilience and influenced his view of the world.
Embracing Dual Identities
For many, cultural identity is a fixed aspect of life. But for those who experience a revelation like George’s, identity becomes fluid. Rather than rejecting one culture for the other, he had to learn to embrace both. He honored the love and traditions of the Georges while also forging connections with the Churchmans, discovering new perspectives about himself in the process.Read more on Frederick J. George’s journey of discovering his true heritage and challenging the conventional notions of identity in his memoir, Switched At Birth: My Life in Someone Else’s World.
