Spoiler alert. Manchester United’s 9-0 win over Southampton on February 2, 2021 was the biggest joint victory in Premier League history.
For a result like this to happen, a devastating finish and comedic defense must combine in a dramatic way.
Here are the occasions throughout Premier League history when these two worlds have faced off to create staggering margins of victory.
Defending champions Blackburn Rovers took Nottingham Forest to the epee 7-0 in November 1995.
Unsurprisingly, Alan Shearer helped himself with a hat trick, with Graham Le Saux also scoring. Norwegian midfielder Lars Bohinen rounded off the matter with a brace.
The previous season, Forest had finished third, making the result all the more shocking.
Barnsley’s only season in the Premier League hasn’t been bad, but their trip to Old Trafford in October certainly was.
Andy Cole gave United a good start, scoring twice in as many minutes halfway through the first half. Ryan Giggs then added another, before Cole finished his hat trick on the stroke of halftime.
Second-half goals from Giggs, Paul Scholes and Karel Poborsky made the Tykes’ misery worse, with the result leaving them a less than 26 goal difference after just 12 games.
Arsenal had six different goal scorers in their historic win over Everton in 2005.
Some of them were also rather unconventional, with defensive midfielders Edu and Mathieu Flamini both listed on the scoresheet.
Robin van Persie and fellow Dutchman Dennis Bergkamp also scored, while French duo Robert Pires – who scored twice – and Patrick Vieira completed the rout.
Current Gunners boss Mikel Arteta was playing midfield for the Toffees this afternoon.
Despite an irresistible strike force in Yakubu and Mark Viduka, Middlesbrough’s defense during the 2005/2006 season was not so impressive.
Steve McClaren’s side delivered seven against Arsenal in January, with Thierry Henry tearing them apart and pulling off a nice hat trick.
Other Gunners scorers included low sock enthusiast Aleksandr Hleb, Philippe Senderos and Robert Pires. Meanwhile, Gilberto Silva scored one of his 17 Premier League goals, nodding at the near post to bring the score to 5-0 on the hour.
Do not adjust your screens. Yes, Stoke by Tony Pulis made once dispatch seven goals.
Salomon Kalou played for Chelsea, picking up a hat trick, with enough result to see the Blues return to the top of the Premier League with two games to go.
Frank Lampard also scored a brace, while Daniel Sturridge and Florent Malouda topped things off with goals in the dying minutes.
Right-back Steven Whittaker as a winger didn’t help Norwich City stem the tide against Manchester City in 2013.
The tone for the Canaries’ disastrous afternoon was set when Bradley Johnson scored an own goal in the 16th minute. Things quickly got worse after that, with strikes from David Silva and Alvaro Negredo, as well as a second goal against his side at Norwich making it 4-0. before the break.
City also showed little mercy in the second half. Yaya Touré, Sergio Aguero and Edin Dzeko all went into the act to increase the eventual champion’s goal difference.
Before their visit to Crystal Palace, people were starting to wonder if Liverpool were exhausted after having accomplished so much in the past few seasons.
The Reds responded to their skeptics with an incredible victory in which Mohamed Salah and Roberto Firmino both landed accolades.
Not to be outdone, Sadio Mane also scored, with Takumi Minamino and Jordan Henderson.
When defender Alan Rodgers went 1-1 against United in 1999, Forest may have had hopes of securing this season’s triple winners.
Instead, the Red Devils have shown remarkable ruthlessness going forward, scoring an unanswered seven points before full time. Dwight Yorke and Andy Cole both have braces, but the man of the hour was Ole Gunnar Solskjaer.
He only came with 20 minutes to go, but still managed to score FOUR times to seal a massive victory.
Ahead of the Abu Dhabi takeover the following summer, City endured a humiliating eight-hour day at Riverside Stadium.
A citizen team containing the likes of Sun Jihai, Benjani and Michael Ball – not the singer – were crushed by MIddlesbrough, with the ridiculous figure Afonso Alves doing a hat trick.
Jeremie Aliadiere, a former Arsenal player, also scored, with Adam Johnson and Stewart Downing securing a brace. The goal pick came from Fabio Rochemback, who scored a trademark free kick, piledriver.
Alan Shearer only became the second man to score five goals in a Premier League game in 1999.
Sheffield Wednesday was its victims, with the late Gary Speed, Aaron Hughes and a young Kieron Dyer also on the scoresheet.
The game was Sir Bobby Robson’s first to lead Newcastle after taking over from Ruud Gullit. Not bad started, eh?
Things weren’t so bad for Wigan at Stamford Bridge – before Gary Caldwell was sent off.
After rallying well after Nicolas Anelka’s early strike, the dismissal knocked out the Latics squad with Chelsea adding seven goals.
Didier Drogba had a hat trick, with Frank Lampard, Salomon Kalou and Ashley Cole all on goal on a day where Carlo Ancelotti’s side confirmed the title in style.
Chelsea were again two years later, this time putting eight ahead of a young Aston Villa side.
Fernando Torres opened the scoring with a rare strike from Chelsea in three minutes and goals kept coming after that.
The Blues have scored seven different scorers in total, with Ramires the only player to have caught a brace. Sharing is benevolent, we suppose.
A lot of terrible things have happened to Sunderland over the past few years, but not as many as these.
The Southampton side that recorded the club’s record-breaking league win over the Black Cats contained several future Premier League stars, with Toby Alderweireld starting and Sadio Mane and Victor Wanyama just well enough for a place on the bench.
Sunderland didn’t really help each other, scoring two own goals, but Saints was still unstoppable with Graziano Pelle scoring a pair of nice finishes.
The 2019/2020 season was not vintage for City, but it has had its moments.
The club’s stunning 8-0 win over Watford was one of them, with David Silva getting the party started in 60 seconds.
City spent the remainder of the game camping on the edge of the Hornets’ box and a ruthlessly effective goal conveyor belt followed.
It has to be one of the craziest games in Premier League history.
At halftime Tottenham were just 1-0 and there was little indication that things were going to happen weird.
First Jermain Defoe grabbed an eight-minute hat trick, which was interrupted by a strike from Paul Scharner. Aaron Lennon then scored, before Defoe added two more to make it 7-1.
An own goal from Chris Kirkland and a neat finish by Harry Redknapp’s favorite son Niko Kranjcar in the dying minutes capped an extraordinary second half.
Until recent developments, United’s 9-0 win over Ipswich was undisputed as the biggest win in Premier League history.
Roy Keane – who played at right-back – opened the scoring in 15 minutes and Ipswich’s resistance from there was nonexistent.
The historic afternoon saw Andy Cole become the first player to score five goals in a single Premier League game, while Mark Hughes nabbed a brace. Paul Ince also scored in controversial circumstances, capitalizing on a free quick to catch up with distressed Craig Forrest.
Reducing to 10 men with less than two minutes left is never a good idea, as Southampton has learned against a creeping United.
After Alex Jankewitz was sacked, the Red Devils took a 4-0 lead at halftime. Two more goals followed, before Jan Bednarek’s controversial red card prompted United to add even more goals before the final whistle.
The result came on Groundhog Day, the meaning of which will become clear after reading our next and final entry …
Leicester City wasted no time making it to Southampton in October 2019 with Ben Chilwell opening the scoring in 10 minutes.
Soon after, Ryan Bertrand was fired and the floodgates were opened. Leicester were leading 5-0 at halftime and would add four more goals before the final whistle.
Spare a bit for James Ward-Prowse, the only player on the pitch for the Saints’ 18 conceded goals against United and Foxes.