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The 20 managers of the Premier League

6

Oh man, Jurgen Klopp taking on Sean Dyche at halftime in Liverpool’s 1-0 home loss to Burnley brought everyone’s best feeling – childishness.

Football is a lot of things: escape, passion, ecstasy, but above all, watching adult men act like children.

Wait, what was Scott? Oh yeah, we once ranked every manager in the Premier League based on their difficulty level. But that was a long time ago – there was a pandemic and we’ve moved to a new location since – and we need a reminder.

So let’s classify them current 20 Premier League managers by their toughness.

Roy Hodgson
Here are the trouble | Sebastian Frej / MB Media / Getty Images

Size: 5’10
Strength: Nope
Weakness: Yes

Poor Roy. Reminds you of your nice grandfather. But the grandfathers aren’t tough and would lose every bit they were involved in.

Brendan Rodgers
It’s time to show real character | Pool / Getty Images

Size: 5’7
Strength: Deceptive smile
Weakness: Fool the lack of height

Stay away from this man. Or do, you could probably take her.

Mikel Arteta
Arteta’s hair is just * too * perfect | Pool / Getty Images

Size: 5’9
Strength: If his Lego head were destroyed, he could just replace it with another
Weakness: Lego tariffs increased after Brexit

Being a connoisseur of turtlenecks is not hard. I should know – I have about 12.

Ole Gunnar Solskjaer
Just happy to be here | Pool / Getty Images

Size: 5’10
Strength: Too crazy for the city of boys
Weakness: Too many boys for a crazy town

Boys will be boys, eh!

Carlo Ancelotti
Don’t give me that look, Carlo | Pool / Getty Images

Size: 5’10
Strength: Was probably difficult in his prime
Weakness: It was 100 years ago

Don Carlo would be fine if he had a position of authority with little physical action. It’s hard.

Phwoarrrrr
Phwoarrrrr | Alex Pantling / Getty Images

Size: 6’1
Strength: Teenager heart
Weakness: He’s literally David Moyes

Just because all men want to be with you and all women want to be with you doesn’t mean you’re tough, Dave.

Pep guardiola
Hehe, looks like he’s wearing this Arsène Wenger coat | Clive Brunskill / Getty Images

Size: 5’11
Strength: Impossible for him to be caught by the hair
Weakness: Has a ripe head to slap

Believe me, I’ve tried it out trying not to make a bald joke. Mother Nature will probably bring me back someday, but not today.

FBL-ENG-PR-LEEDS-BRIGHTON
Yes, director | MICHAEL REGAN / Getty Images

Size: 6’1
Strength: Experiencing the harsh winters of Sweden hardened him
Weakness: The experience of strong winds off Brighton softened it

There is a ceiling on the height of a man called “Graham” can be placed on this list.

Scott Parker
This clash of color… our survey says – EGH EGH | Clive Rose / Getty Images

Size: 5’9
Strength: World famous The streets act of homage
Weakness: It’s not the X factor, mate

Scott Parker likes to wear two-tone suits. It won’t fly around those parts.

Looking like the pigeon lady from Home Alone 2
Resembling the pigeon lady from Home Alone 2 | Clive Brunskill / Getty Images

Size: 5’9
Strength: The dirtiest fighter in the game
Weakness: We have VAR now

The strongest weak fighter or the weaker strong fighter? Either way, series winner Jose Mourinho will have to settle for 11th place here.

Steve bruce
The real pigeon lady from Home Alone 2 | Sebastian Frej / MB Media / Getty Images

Size: 6’0
Strength: Gargantuan
Weakness: Gargantuan lack of agility

Big Brucey baby might fend for himself, but he’s not going to bother the (metaphorically and physical) big boys.

Frank Lampard
CHELSEA! CHELSEA! CHELSEA! CHELSEA! CHELSEA! | Pool / Getty Images

Size: 6’0
Strength: Picks fights with journalists
Weakness: May not be a Premier League manager any longer

“I want to be in a song, I think I could show these guys a thing or two! … No but seriously, I think it will be difficult and I would do well to get the three points. ”

Dean smith
Believe Me There Weren’t Many “Dean Smith” Pictures | Clive Mason / Getty Images

Size: 6’0
Strength: Proper Brummie
Weakness: Appropriate Brummie accent

One of my best friends played for Dean Smith. Confirms he’s tough.

Marcelo Bielsa
Crouching Tiger, Spy Hiding in Derby County Bushes | Pool / Getty Images

Size: 6’0
Strength: Has detailed reports on all other managers
Weakness: Would be stunned by the time he was done reading

Marcelo Bielsa has previously faced angry fans outside his home while holding a grenade. It’s pretty tough, but what does he know about punches?

Nuno Espirito Santo
What a hug man | Shaun Botterill / Getty Images

Size: 6’2
Strength: Large bushy beard
Weakness: Easy to grasp

Did you know Nuno was Porto’s secondary goalkeeper when Mourinho was in charge? I bet you’ve never logged into a Wolves game and heard it before!

Anyway, sixth.

Sam allardyce
The greatest of the Sams | Matthew Ashton – AMA / Getty Images

Size: 6’3
Strength: Could drink his weight in sauce
Weakness: It would probably compromise him

When Mourinho was asked in the mid and late 2000s which Premier League manager he would least like to fight, his response was simple: “Big Sam!”

Jurgen klopp
Put it back, Jurgen | Pool / Getty Images

Size: 6’4
Strength: May be in a bad mood after a loss
Weakness: Everyone is convinced that now

How to beat Jurgen Klopp in a fight: Let him beat your team while you try to play expansive attacking football to keep him happy.

Sadly, Liverpool haven’t won much lately.

Chris Wilder
Eyes on the price – the lowest points record | Sebastian Frej / MB Media / Getty Images

Size: 6’0
Strength: Everyone in Sheffield is tough
Weakness: Definitely calls lunch “dinner” and dinner “tea”

Do you know how tough you have to be to constantly annoy the manager of the Premier League champions when your own team is the worst team ever? Klopp is clearly threatened by the great Chrissy Wilder.

Ralph hasenhuttl
Big Girls Don’t Cry, Ralph | Robin Jones / Getty Images

Size: 6’3
Strength: Pure size
Weakness: Always cry

On a scale from one to Daniel Farke, Hasenhuttl’s voice is not this little intimidating. But it’s enough to cost him a few points at the top.

Sean dyche
IT’S TIME TO PLAY THE GAME | Pool / Getty Images

Size: 6’0
Strength: In large quantities
Weakness: Towards

Sean Dyche doesn’t care about the Grand Canyon – the only rock formation he’s interested in is 4-4-f ****** – 2.

Once he leaves Burnley, he will take on the role of the Queen’s bodyguard. It’s a 90 mins exclusive for free.

To learn more about Sean Walsh, follow him on Twitter!

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